I'm new here, and sinking fast

Sometimes, it is good to talk to a therapist and ask how to proceed in this situation. Wishing you all well. God bless you.

Thanks Marcie, I will think about it.

If you talked to him openly would he consider staying married & you having a girlfriend? Would you accept that as an option?

Hi hiswife84....I don't know, I really need to talk to him, he might be ok with it, but it has always be something he has wanted, Us and another woman. I don't think I would be will to share. It all so new to me and I need to see for myself who I am.

Well if you talk to him maybe he will be ok with you dating females first then bringing one home. Threesomes are quite enjoyable you just have to have the right connection with your two partners.

I don't know about inviting anyone into your bed, but I do think you should be open with your husband. You really don't have a choice, right? You're going crazy and something has to be done. The truth should not hurt. I know sometimes it does, but you are already hurting.
The father of my 2 children and I were divorced after he moved out of our bed when the second baby was still very little. I couldn't handle a marriage without sex and push came to shove, I tried to warn him, get him to see counselor, etc... finally I did the only thing I could really do to get the message to him, I had been kissing a guy from my work, I let him have intercourse with me. I had been careful to get involved with someone who I knew I would not fall for and he knew what I was doing... So it felt somewhat "safe" to me in that respect... Stupid, I know, but thats what happened. After our divorce (he could not forgive me-that was a surprise to me) I realized I have never really felt close to a man, never felt understood or understood him. I met a woman online and we got along great. Sex is still problematic for me. I have better luck reaching an orgasm by myself and all of my partners, male and the one female, have found this difficult to accept.
I'm now separated for about 2 years and don't know if I should be looking for a man or a woman!

hi, have you tried to explore your interest in women, but not letting your husband now there's something romantic going on? you could be "friends" with a woman and see if that's what you really want. about honesty... i think is overestimated sometimes; be careful on what you tell your husband, you can't unring a bell.